


the confession that i couldn't make

by technicolours



Series: xo [1]
Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst with a Happy Ending, Byun Baekhyun & Park Chanyeol are Best Friends, Coffee Shops, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Light Angst, M/M, Mentioned Kim Jongin | Kai, Mentioned Kim Minseok | Xiumin, Mentioned Oh Sehun, Minor Kim Jongdae | Chen/Kim Minseok | Xiumin, Mutual Pining, Past Do Kyungsoo | D.O/Kim Jongin | Kai, accidental love confession, jongdae and minseok are baristas
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-02
Updated: 2017-09-02
Packaged: 2018-12-21 03:02:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,226
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11934951
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/technicolours/pseuds/technicolours
Summary: Chanyeol frowns at Baekhyun’s silence. “What? Is it that bad?” He sweeps the camera around his face, angling his phone to his profile so that Baekhyun can see the light hit his newly colored hair, strands falling out from behind his too-large ears that Baekhyun finds so strangely endearing.“No, I,” Baekhyun starts to say. Chanyeol raises his eyebrows, and Baekhyun doesn't know how to respond. 'I love it,' he thinks. 'I love you.'or, baekhyun accidentally confesses to chanyeol over facetime.





	the confession that i couldn't make

**Author's Note:**

> yikes I haven't written a fic since like 2014 so be nice ok!! also I'm fairly new to kpop but something about chanbaek makes me so soft so here we go
> 
> title from "sing for you" because I'm still emo over it

_“Okay,”_ Chanyeol’s voice comes out tinny from the speakers of the phone. He covers the camera with his finger, so all Baekhyun can see is darkness where his best friend’s face should be. _“Tell me how it looks.”_

Slowly, light creeps into Chanyeol’s side of the screen, and Baekhyun’s met with the sight of the younger boy’s grinning face, his hair a silvery pastel lilac hue.

Baekhyun gapes blankly at the screen - only a select few can manage to pull off colorful hair, let alone bright purple, but Chanyeol…

Chanyeol frowns at Baekhyun’s silence. _“What? Is it that bad?”_ He sweeps the camera around his face, angling his phone to his profile so that Baekhyun can see the light hit his newly colored hair, strands falling out from behind his too-large ears that Baekhyun finds so strangely endearing.

“No, I,” Baekhyun starts to say. Chanyeol raises his eyebrows, and Baekhyun briefly wonders how exactly he should respond. _I love it_ , he thinks. _I love you_.

There’s silence on Chanyeol’s end of the line, and Baekhyun snaps out of his daze to see his best friend slash unrequited love staring at him with his eyes wide, mouth agape just so.

It hits him, in that moment, that he had carelessly blurted out his thoughts. He takes everything in, from Chanyeol’s shocked expression and the gravity of his words, and chokes out, “ _Chan_...” The line goes dead. “... _yeol_.” Baekhyun sets down his phone, heart pounding in his chest. He picks it back up, checking the time, and sends a quick text to Kyungsoo, even though he knows he'll be out for the next few hours.

 **To: Soo**  
**[3:55 P.M]** Emergency!!!

He knows he has to get out of his apartment before he implodes in a mess of feelings and panicked nerves. Grabbing his keys and his wallet, he throws on a hoodie and starts to head to the cafè where Jongdae works. He tries not to think of the fact that Chanyeol’s door is diagonal from his, and prays to every higher power he can think of that Chanyeol won't think to stop by the cafè or come by his place when he heads home.

Around ten minutes later, Baekhyun steps into the cafè and is immediately greeted by the familiar aroma of freshly ground coffee and sweet pastries. He orders a cup of coffee before he sits down at his usual table, and his phone buzzes.

 **From: Soo**  
**[4:07 P.M]** sorry just got this.  
**[4:07 P.M]** What happened?

 **To: Soo**  
**[4:08 P.M]** chanyeol  
**[4:08 P.M]** I'm at the cafe

 **From: Soo**  
**[4:11 P.M]** be there in 10

Baekhyun pockets his phone as Jongdae approaches the table with a drink in tow. “Dae,” he sighs, dropping his arms on the table and pillowing his head on them. “I'm such an idiot.”

“Yes, we all knew that,” the blond responds, but there's no malice to his snarky tone. “And you look like shit. What's wrong?”

“Everything,” Baekhyun says dramatically, words muffled by the fabric of his hoodie. He lifts his head up. “Hypothetically,” he starts. “Hypothetically, if you accidentally confessed your undying love to your best friend over FaceTime and he hung up on you, what would you do?”

“Hypothetically?” Jongdae narrows his eyes. “Is this about Chanyeol?”

“That's… not the point,” Baekhyun tries to deflect, but gives up. Jongdae has always been able to see right through him. “I meant everything I said, I just don't know how to talk to him about it without ruining our entire friendship.” He pauses to glance at Jongdae, to the dark-haired barista with the cat-like eyes taking a girl’s coffee orders, and back to Jongdae. “You'd know, wouldn't you?”

Jongdae catches his wandering eyes. “Ya! That's not- that's not what you think,” he sputters. “That's completely different.”

“Is it, though?” Baekhyun challenges.

“Hey, we’re here to talk about your love life, not mine,” Jongdae whines. “Or, you know, your complete lack of one.”

Baekhyun drops his head back on his arms and groans. “You're no help,” he grumbles, but doesn't argue. As unhelpful as his words are, Jongdae does have a point. Kind of. “Where the hell is Soo?”

“Right here,” a voice says from behind him. Kyungsoo, Baekhyun's advice-giving friend slash roommate, materializes out of seemingly nowhere, pulls out a chair and sits down, drinking in Jongdae’s pained expression and Baekhyun sprawled on the tabletop. He looks a bit shaken up, which Jongdae comments on, but Kyungsoo brushes it off as nothing in typical Kyungsoo fashion.

“So what's wrong?”

“Jongdae?” Baekhyun prompts, lifting his head slightly to meet Kyungsoo’s inscrutable expression.

“Right,” Jongdae clears his throat. “Baekhyun was video chatting Chanyeol and accidentally confessed to him.”

“How do you accidentally confess?” Kyungsoo frowns.

“It just slipped out, okay?” Baekhyun pouts. “He was showing me his new hair, since he and Sehun lost the bet, and I was supposed to say something about how it looks nice or whatever and I ended up saying ‘I love you’ instead of ‘I love it.’”

Jongdae raises his eyebrows. “How does one fuck up that badly?”

“Jongdae, don't you have, like, coffee to serve or something?” Kyungsoo interjects.

Jongdae jumps up from his seat in sudden realization. “Fuck! Minseok hyung, I’m so sorry,” he calls to the barista. He turns to Baekhyun, patting him on the head. “Good luck with Chanyeol.”

“Dae,” Baekhyun stops him before he can leave, “don't say anything to him, alright? I want everything to come from me.”

“Of course,” Jongdae nods. Then, as an afterthought, he adds, “I promise to only intervene if you two get even more insufferable than you already are.”

“Wait,” Baekhyun says, taking in his words. “What?”

But Jongdae’s already behind the counter, grinning from ear to ear as he chats amiably with Minseok. He catches Baekhyun’s bewildered expression and smirks, before turning back to his conversation.

Baekhyun sighs, reaching for his drink. Kyungsoo has that strange expression on his face again. “Soo?” He prods. “You okay?”

“Yeah,” his roommate responds. “I just… I saw Jongin on campus today.”

Baekhyun almost chokes on a sip of his iced Americano. “What? He's really back?”

Kyungsoo shrugs. “I guess. But that’s not the important thing right now.”

“Riiight,” Baekhyun isn't convinced, but he lets it slide for now. “What do I do?”

“Honestly?” Kyungsoo responds, running a hand through his short hair. “Give him space. You said he hung up?”

Baekhyun nods. “I'm scared, Soo. He's my best friend-” he stops, glancing at Kyungsoo, and adds, “well, one of them. I don't want to ruin our friendship if he doesn't feel the same.”

“Knowing Chanyeol,” Kyungsoo says, “I highly doubt your feelings are unrequited. But that's up to you two to figure out.”

Sighing loudly and dramatically, Baekhyun reaches for his coffee again. “You're right. As always.”

“Mm,” Kyungsoo hums, checking the time on his phone. “Are you done bothering Jongdae for the night, or should we wait until closing time to walk home?”

Baekhyun shifts in his seat to look at where the counter is, where Jongdae and Minseok are giggling with each other as Minseok fixes a drink for a customer. He mouths, _you want us to stay_?The blond shakes his head, still grinning happily. As Kyungsoo and Baekhyun gather their things to leave, Jongdae waves and calls out, “Good luck!”

Baekhyun smiles, though he knows it doesn't reach his eyes, and waves back as he exits, the bells above the door jingling behind them. God knows he needs all the luck in the world right now.

 

•••••

 **To: Chanyeollie**  
**[1:34 A.M]** hey are you awake?

The words don't feel right. Too casual, as if nothing had happened. Baekhyun deletes the words and starts typing again.

 **To: Chanyeollie**  
**[1:35 A.M]** i need to talk to you.

Deleted.

 **To: Chanyeollie**  
**[1:36 A.M]** I didn't mean it that way.

A lie. And besides, Baekhyun doesn't have it in him to send something like that. Deleted, once again.

 **To: Chanyeollie**  
**[1:37 A.M]** fuck I love you i’m so in love with you but i’m scared that I just ruined everything

He shakes his head; he's bold when it comes to certain things, but not this. He taps the backspace, erasing the incriminating words.

 **To: Chanyeollie**  
**[1:40 A.M]** hey yeol, I really need to talk to you but I understand if you need some space. just get back to me soon, ok?  
**[1:40 A.M]** you're my best friend. I don't want to lose you.

Before he can chicken out, Baekhyun hits send, doesn't wait to see if Chanyeol will respond, and rolls over in his bed.

He doesn't get much sleep.

•••••

 

Baekhyun doesn't see or hear from Chanyeol for the next week, and as the academic year begins, he settles into his usual routine of attending class and studying. Although Kyungsoo and Jongdae are around often, he still can't help but feel Chanyeol’s absence everywhere he goes.

The three of them are lounging around in Kyungsoo and Baekhyun’s apartment, procrastinating on work and watching a rerun of some variety show on T.V with an empty space on the couch where a certain lanky giant should be. Kyungsoo catches Baekhyun staring wistfully and sighs.

“Jongdae,” Kyungsoo says, out of the blue. “Isn't Chanyeol suspicious of all the time you've been splitting between us and him? He is your roommate, after all.”

“He's been burying himself in his studies,” Jongdae shrugs, taking a bite of his pizza. “I haven't really seen him much this past week, now that I think about it.”

“Huh,” Kyungsoo says quietly. Though he bickers with Chanyeol constantly and outwardly pretends to dislike him, Baekhyun knows that he cares deeply about the taller boy. Not that he'd ever admit it.

“I'm not sure if I’m allowed to mention this,” Jongdae mumbles around a mouthful of pizza. Kyungsoo shoots him a disgusted look, and Jongdae rolls his eyes but swallows before speaking again. “But Chanyeol asked about you.”

“ _Jongdae_! Why the fuck would you mention that now?” Baekhyun shouts, pelting his friend with one of the couch cushions. “What did he say?”

“You know, normally I would make fun of you for sounding so desperate, but at this point it's getting a bit sad so I'll hold my tongue,” Kyungsoo mutters. Baekhyun glares, but lets it go.

There’s a sudden knock at the door, causing Baekhyun to jump. Suspiciously enough, his other friends don't seem fazed, as if they were expecting it.

Jongdae smirks. “I don't know, why don't you ask him yourself?” With this, he stuffs the rest of his pizza into his mouth, grabs another slice, and runs towards the door. Kyungsoo follows, having the decency to throw Baekhyun an apologetic look over his shoulder as he chases after Jongdae.

When his two friends clear out, Chanyeol is left standing in the doorway, looking unsure of himself.

“Uh, hi,” Baekhyun says weakly. “I like your hair?”

Chanyeol smiles and says, “I know.” He glances around awkwardly, and Baekhyun wants to hit himself because this is exactly what he was afraid would happen - Chanyeol doesn't feel the same, and now everything’s going to be weird between them.

“Um, come in,” Baekhyun says, breaking out of his trance. Chanyeol shuffles inside, closing the door slowly. When he turns around, he has an unreadable look on his face when he says, “we need to talk.”

 

•••••

 

“I'm sorry,” Baekhyun says. “Would it make you feel better if I said I didn't mean it like that?”

“Baekhyun-”

“Or, I mean, we could pretend it never happened, you know? Like, we can just ignore this and move on and if we can go back to being friends and I don't have to spend all my time watching Jongdae pine after Minseok hyung and Kyungsoo be weird about his ex-” Baekhyun’s just blabbering on at this point. Anything to get Chanyeol to, well, do something.

“Baekhyun!” Chanyeol exclaims.

Sheepishly, he looks up, feeling a bit like a scolded dog. But to his shock, Chanyeol looks like he's fighting back a laugh. “Just, just shut up and listen, okay?”

He nods, braces himself for the yeah I don't feel the same speech, though he knows it's coming. He just prays that Chanyeol won't say something along the lines of you fucked up our entire friendship and I don't think we should see each other anymore, because he really doesn't think he’ll be able to bear it.

“Look, when you said that, I freaked out a little and hung up. I mean, I was trying to get the courage to say it, and you just went ahead and blurted it out over FaceTime, so, not really an ideal confession,” Chanyeol trails off, rubbing the back of his head shyly.

“Wait, you… what?” Baekhyun swears his heart is pounding so loud that Chanyeol can probably hear it from his side of the sofa.

“And okay, maybe disappearing for a week was a little too much. I wasn't expecting, well, all of that.”

“Chan? What are you…” he’s suddenly losing his words as he takes in Chanyeol’s soft smile and when did he get so close?

It's quiet, and for a few short seconds, the two are left staring at each other, hearts beating fast. Then, suddenly, Baekhyun doesn't know who leans in first - maybe it's both of them? And Chanyeol’s lips are pressed against his, soft at first, but his kisses become more desperate, more fervent as Baekhyun’s fingers curl around Chanyeol’s colorful hair, his body falling into place on top of Chanyeol’s.

“What I'm saying is,” Chanyeol begins, a few minutes later. Baekhyun’s laying on his chest as he presses lazy kisses to the taller boy’s jaw, feeling more content than he has ever been in a while. “I love… your hair.”

Baekhyun stops, and pulls his head back, a mortified expression on his face. “I hate you.”

“You love me,” Chanyeol laughs, wrapping an arm around the back of Baekhyun’s neck to pull him back down.

“Unfortunately,” Baekhyun grumbles, but settles his head on Chanyeol’s chest contentedly.

“Good,” Chanyeol says, and Baekhyun can hear the smile in his voice. “Because you're stuck with me forever. I'm not going anywhere.”

 

•••••

 

“Ugh, seriously? Again?” Kyungsoo’s disgusted voice rings out as soon as the door opens. Baekhyun sheepishly grabs his shirt, balled into a crumpled mess on the floor by the couch and puts it on. Chanyeol does the same, rubbing at the mark on his neck that Baekhyun had so happily made before they had been so rudely interrupted.

“I live here too, assholes,” Kyungsoo grumbles. Jongdae pokes his head in the doorway at the commotion and gives them a thumbs up, walking in after Kyungsoo and shutting the door. “And the couch is a public space! Go… do whatever you do in the bedroom, or Chanyeol’s place.”

“How was your date?” Chanyeol smirks, changing the subject with his eyebrows raised. As an afterthought, he gestures to his and Baekhyun’s messy clothes and explains, “we weren't expecting you to come home after, so…”

“Gross,” Kyungsoo retorts. “I don't want to hear about how you two can't keep your hands off of each other for more than two minutes. I've already walked in on that too many times for it to be good for my sanity.”

“But really, how was it?” Baekhyun prods, resting his head on his much taller boyfriend’s shoulder. “Junmyeon, right?”

Kyungsoo nods. “Honestly? He’s still recovering from a pretty bad breakup and I'm not really sure I'm looking for a relationship right now. But he's a nice guy, so at the very least, I think I made a new friend? I also told him about that empty room across the hall, since he mentioned he's looking for a new place. I mean, it's unlikely we’ll go on a second date, but it's nice to have a friend outside of you two perverts and Jongdae, so.”

“Soo,” Chanyeol pouts. “You wound me.”

“You know it's true. And you don't live here, why are you still invading our space?”

“Hey, Jongdae’s here too!” Chanyeol complains.

“Yeah, well Jongdae hasn't tried to fuck anyone on the couch,” Kyungsoo retorts. He frowns at the blond. “Have you?”

“I can't believe you're asking Jongdae, who can't work up the nerve to go up to his coworker and say ‘hey, wanna get coffee sometime?’ if he's fucked anyone on our couch,” Baekhyun cackles.

“Ya! We work at a coffee shop, why would I ask him if he wants to get coffee, you idiot!” Jongdae exclaims.

“This was the point,” Baekhyun gestures with one hand, “and this is you,” he says, taking the other hand and moving it above the first.

Chanyeol and Kyungsoo laugh, and Jongdae opens his mouth to complain. He sits down on the couch, pushing Baekhyun onto Chanyeol’s lap, and the trio glances up expectantly at Kyungsoo.

“What?” He frowns, scanning his friends’ earnest, puppy-like expressions. Realization dawns on him, and his large eyes widen. “No. I’m not buying food again. Go home!”

“Chanyeol can pay,” Baekhyun supplies. His boyfriend looks at him with mild horror, and Baekhyun just shoots him his most charming smile.

“Well, if that's the case…” Kyungsoo shrugs, and sits down on the chair adjacent to the sofa. “Let's get sushi.”

“How dare you pick the most expensive kind of takeout, I'm a broke college student-” Chanyeol begins to protest, but Kyungsoo fixes him with a level glare and points out “we all are,” which shuts him up, leaving him to grumble as he takes everyone's orders and dials the number on his phone.

They end up watching a variety show, laughing together at the funny sketches in between bites of food. Baekhyun has a sudden feeling of deja vu when he glances around, seeing everyone’s eyes fixed on the T.V., thinking of that day when Kyungsoo and Jongdae had forced him to talk to Chanyeol.

But this time, Chanyeol’s there on the couch with him, running his fingers through Baekhyun’s hair absently as he laughs at something Kyungsoo says. Baekhyun takes it all in, from Jongdae, who’s stuffing his face with a sushi roll and almost chokes mid-laugh while Kyungsoo gives him a look but still smacks him on the back so he doesn't die, to Chanyeol, with his pastel purple hair and bright smile, who looks at him with stars in his eyes and still makes him awestruck because he wonders how the hell he ever got so lucky.

Baekhyun sits up abruptly, though he's mostly still in Chanyeol’s lap. He taps his boyfriend on the shoulder, and says, “don't change your hair.” Chanyeol raises his eyebrows. “Hm?” He knows the answer, but Baekhyun enlightens him anyway.

“I love it,” he says. The second part’s left unsaid, but they both know it. Chanyeol smiles, kissing him while they ignore Jongdae and Kyungsoo’s various noises of disgust. Jongdae pelts him with the cushion he had been sitting on ( _“that's revenge for last time and also because you guys are so gross”_ ) and Baekhyun pulls away, grinning. He's happy - he's got Chanyeol beside him, his best friend, probable love of his life, and his annoying best friends who will support him through everything. Probably. 

He's home.

**Author's Note:**

> hello, hopefully this wasn't too painful.. this is part one of a series I'm writing, if you couldn't tell by the little hints I've placed within the story in regards to other characters ;)
> 
> anyway if u enjoyed come talk to me on tumblr about chanbaek or exo or chinguline or kpop in general !!  
> txchnicolourbeats.tumblr.com


End file.
